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Behind all great American fortunes, and probably most of the small ones lies a theft of monumental proportions. Classes on Basic Ethics and Morals are as unnecessary as classes in civics. If I rob someone, I am a thief or a banker. If I steal enough, I am praised as a great entrepennauer. This is the American way. Money absolves you of all guilt. As far as groping a few, (or many) women are concerned this is an advantage when seeking higher office - as in President. If there had been a Fox News TV show he could have become President, as this is an opportunity for self-enrichment exceeded only by owning a bank.

Avoiding paying taxes is another time-honored American practice. Why should self-made billionaires give away any of the hard-earned (stolen) money to the shiftless masses (Who are always conceived of as people of color)? They made (stole) all that money themselves, with no help from anyone - including their mothers. Makes me believe in post-birth abortion. As the Republicans say, "I got mine, F**K you if you don't get any).

I would like to compliment Taiwan on its excellent foreign policy. I see where they just purchased 200,000 cases of rum made in Lithuania and were being refused entry by China. I always thought rum came from Cuba - that bastion of communism that has infected the Caribbean with ideas of universal healthcare and hand-rolled cigars.

If you are still trying to lose weight, I can strongly recommend increasing your rum intake. You may not lose the weight, but you won't care. See Jimmy Buffet's Margaritaville for further weight-loss advice.

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